I am very active in the theater at my college. We're currently producing Sweeney Todd, which opens tomorrow. This will be the seventh show I've worked on here as a stitcher and member of a costume crew. In the 1.5 years I've helped out, I have learned a lot about stressful working environments and how passionate a person must really be about theatre to keep coming back every show. And when I mean passionate, I mean crazy. Seriously. Today, I've decided to open up about a few of the things I have been through as a costumer. (Be prepared for stream-of-consciousness writing)
1. Lets start with the shop itself. Our costume shop is a disaster. When our new designer took over last year, she was not prepared for the insanity she found: clothes racks in no particular order, shoes only organized by gender, and not size. Hats sorted by color instead of period people would have worn them. Imagine trying to find Victorian era hats in over 75 giant tubs organized by color. Yes, you have to go through practically every tub. At least they're clear tubs, and sometimes you can tell if a tub doesn't have anything you'd want. But most of the time, I have to drag a ladder over to the shelves, pull a tub out from under two other tubs (all on the third shelf), and then the tub ends up having nothing of use in it. Oh, what time we have wasted searching for the box of top hats! The shop is insanely inefficient.
2. Things get lost. Every single day, one thing of major importance is misplaced. And usually, it's an actor's garment. Most of the time it's their fault, but sometimes costumers are guilty suspects; I'll own up to it. When we have around forty people we have to dress, things get messy. And there are actors who are just terrible at keeping track of their own things. When you're taking off a costume piece, don't just throw it down! Pay attention! We can't afford to replace everything that gets lost or damaged; we are a poor school, and I can't stress that enough. And when I get blamed by an actor for their own lack of attentiveness, it drives me insane. Hats and shoes are the things they lose most often, though yesterday a girl misplaced a petticoat. I don't know where she found it, but I don't understand how she lost her huge, white, fluffy petticoat in the first place. It's huge. But as I said before, some things are a costumer's fault. I misplaced a man's pants I repaired in the shop because I didn't immediately return them, and another stitcher piled her stuff on top of it. This happens. But to actors: PLEASE don't lose things. I often have enough going on that your lack of attentiveness can send me into a legitimate panic.
3. I work a lot for no pay. Let's make this crystal clear: when tech week rolls around, I'm usually putting in at least 10 hours a day sewing your clothes, finding costume pieces, etc. I am here before the actors arrive for rehersal. Yesterday, I got there at noon to work, while actors started arriving around five. At the end of the night, I left the same time they did: just after midnight. For TWELVE hours I had to stare at fabrics. I got so overwhelmed that I am still achy and exausted from it. And yet, I'll be going in in another hour or so to spend probably seven more hours sewing. Some days I love what I do, but other days make me want to curl up and die. For everything I do FOR FREE, sometimes I'd like a little more courtesy and respect. I'm not asking for much: just keep track of your things, don't rush me to do something unless it's completely necessary, and give me some thanks. Kind people are the reason I'm still doing this at all.
4. Disrespect. Here, I'm not even really talking about disrespect toward me. This is about the way so many actors disrespect the rules of the theater. I know costumes; when I tell you not to eat in costume, that should be enough for you. When the DIRECTOR had to hold a meeting at the beginning of the first fall show to discuss proper theater etiquette and EXPLICITLY said that professional actors do not eat in costume, this should never EVER be an issue. I keep coming to this time and time again. How stupid are you people? Sure, if you're just eating crackers I don't expect that to mess up your costume, but there are two reasons that this is still wrong. Firstly, if one smart person eats a dry food that won't mess up their costume, a stupid person will see that and think it's okay to eat... bbq, for example. We say "Don't eat in costume" because one simple rule is something everyone can comprehend. Secondly, it's purely about respect for the establishment. You got CHOSEN to act in this. You should feel honored. So to go against the rules set up by the theatre that has given you this opportunity is disgusting to me. If I were the director who worked here, I wouldn't hire you back. If you can't follow one simple rule, how can I trust you to do a good job on my stage? Eating in costume is disrespectful to the theater, to the director, to everyone who works in the costume shop. I take it as a personal sign of disrespect toward me. I BEG actors not to eat in costume. I've literally had to yell at a couple actors before. You guys don't respect me, so you don't deserve my respect. I could rant about this all day.
5. I hate child actors. There are exceptions, but generally I find them to be brats. Then again, the last show I worked on before Sweeney Todd was Annie, and there were no adults downstairs looking after the children. When I saw a boy stealing candy from one of the girls and I told him to stop... "You're not the boss of me." At that moment, I gave up on the idea of having children. How ****ing ridiculous. I hated that child with every fiber of my being. From now on, if he's ever in another show here, I'm not working it. I can not deal with being around that boy. I will not tolerate it.
6. This is my last note, and all I want to say is that working in costumes is painful. We'll have wonderful fittings, won't have too much work to do, then the day of dress rehearsal is the day the entire cast comes in to say that something is wrong with every single costume piece. 30 or more people in the shop at once needing skirts hemmed, waists adjusted, pants hemmed, a different shirt, new shoes, where's my this or that, what should I do with my hair, I lost my hat, turns out two other crew members need costumes, make this thing from scratch. And we have an hour before rehearsal itself starts. Have you ever seen the television show Community? The character Abed doesn't always handle stress well. He'll freeze in place and just start yelling. I've started doing that, and I find it to be quite beneficial. I also make up random phrases to let out my frustration. The other day, I just spouted out, "I do not like green eggs and ham. I do not like them, Sam I am." Sometimes I just feel the need to voice my frustration in a non-confrontational way. Oh, and I've been near crying several times. I've come to expect that at every show. It's not a success if I haven't cried at least once. Usually, the thing that breaks me is eating in costume. It's so bloody simple, I don't understand why people can't figure out that they aren't supposed to do it.
Bless the people who walk up to me and tell me I'm doing a good job. Bless the people who thank me for helping them. Bless the people who come in to help us. Bless the people who bring cookies (also, screw you. Actors eat those in costume). Now, I'm going to take a nap, because I really can't deal with classes right now. I love tech week.<= I say that when I feel like hiding in a nook among the racks and crying alone in the darkness. And when I feel like being a sarcastic ass.
